i don’t know what i am doing

i don’t know where i am going

i don’t know what i want

all i know

is i’m not happy yet

i see happiness

it seems so achievable

if i can just get there

but i don’t understand there

is it a place? a thought? a state of being?

why is this so hard for me to comprehend?

does  everyone have this problem?

or am i


should i not


to be there

is there simply my imagination?

i look at everyone else and they seem okay with this, this status quo of get up and go to work and come home and sleep and get up and do the same thing tomorrow. sometimes there’s a weekend. sometimes there’s someone else to spend time with and maybe at some point you’ll have babies and you’ll raise them and they’ll do the same damn thing for their entire lives and will it ever amount to anything at all i don’t know all i know is i don’t want this

i want what’s there

Happy June guys! I’ve being having these really tough thoughts lately and just really struggling with life and how exactly I’m supposed to get to a place where I’m happy to be living it. I have so many desires it can be hard to figure out exactly what I should be pursuing, especially since most of what I want to do has nothing in common with earning any sort of living. This pretty much equates to me working soul sucking jobs (read: I’m currently working at a call center and have not made A SINGLE SALE so who knows how much longer I’ll even be working there) just to maybe hopefully pay the bills. I’m just not super happy with things right now, not necessarily with what I’m doing – pursuing acting and all that – just the way things are working out. So I wrote something. A poem? I dunno. It’s something. And I figured I’d share it. Maybe there’s someone else sort of kind of feeling this way. Or maybe not. But there you go.

2 thoughts on “there

  1. There is what ever you want it to be it is different for everyone and you don’t always know when your there you just have to take your time and do what you think you need to do to get there. The big thing is to never stop trying until you get there.

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